Zelda

Five years and a decade ago today

I got a NES for Christmas.

I started to play Castlevania II;

The first game that I purchased

After the Mario and Duck Hunt cross-cartridge.

It was a hobby of my generation, no doubt.

If you dissed Ganon, you know what I'm about:

Whippin' Dracula like fireballs at Koopa,

Javelins to Lucifer, arrows to Medusa.

Dragon Warriors- my game of choice.

And SNK Baseball would make a girl moist.

I power up my die; thought I was bad.

Then when I fired at them.. man, I felt sad.

Hour after hour I'd explored the land.

Cruisin' in the Turtle Van, yeah man!

Blowin' in the cartridge to get it to work.

Sometimes it'd even help to push it to the side.

Aside from that, it was all so much fun.

Sonic is a bitch, all he can do is run.

Pop in Contra, rip it apart-

Up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, B, A, start.

I thought it was the bomb makin' a game about Goonies.

Library titles like an an arcade in my room.

We stayed up all late night,

Hopin' that we would fight

Mike Tyson with Flamenco went down with a left-right.

Setting our goal, a two hour tradition,

After practicing Rygar in a mission

I could have another chance to fight Lygar.

If a sequel comes out, then make one for Strydar.

Why are these games being sold dirt-cheap?

'Cause River City Ransom took about eight weeks

To save our allowance; rememberin' how it felt

Waitin' for Mario 3 and like I'm in Auswitch.

Six bombs flash and I'm in one too.

Goombas be tryin' to grab on my shoe.

I don't care if the drums are static.

Negative one, you can tell it's a habit.

Mom tells me to put my clothes in the hamper,

Then I shoot her with my grey zapper.

She's tryin' to get me off to school,

But I tell her that I'm sick so that I can beat two.

I'm jumpin' around,

Flyin' around,

Goin' to town,

Killin' the slime,

Stoppin' time,

Skate Or Die,

Nintendo,

Bitch!