Relapse

Here I am again trying to forget the past but I can’t pretend that it won’t make its way back

I can’t look at you the same as I could before

Even though apologies were made I feel it more and more

In the back of my head lies memories repressed as I begin the salvage the happiness I have left

Too young to take in all the problems at hand but old enough to know exactly where I stand

Rebuild, rebuild

I’ll do whatever it takes to have my mind sit still

Cut you off cause I’ve had enough

I’m sick hearing I need to “toughen up”

This is not the way that I’m supposed to be

I’m fucking drowning and you’re letting me

Please, no more

I’m too far gone to float back to shore now

You’re still reading the book but guess what?

I skipped to the last chapter

We all die at the end.

Regardless of the way you pretend that my best interest is at hand

It’s just the way you pull me down

It’s like I can’t do a thing for myself without you…

Pulling at my sleeves

All you want to do is drag to my knees

Pulling at my sleeves

All you want to do is drag me to my fucking knees

And now I find myself believing in fictitious heroes

I’ve come to know at the end of the day it’s just the way that the wind blows

I can only save myself without your help

So if this is what it has to come to, you’re another burned bridge under my belt

The calm before the storm…forming around me, closing me in

The feeling begins

Here I am again trying to forget the past but I can’t pretend that it won’t make its way back

I can’t look at you the same as I could before

Even though apologies were made I feel it more and more