Left In The Dark

Once in a while i'd like to do

Do something thats just for me

But im constantly finding a way around

Not having to show a white flag

See its not that i'm trying to brag

Its an impediment that I just can't shake

Dont get hung up about the things you

Cant keep pulling all the strings

And have control over every little aspect of

Everything you have, its not secure

And they'll leave you wanting more

If the right offer comes along then they'll take it

But I dont blame them - I blame myself

For getting so attached that I cant let go

I dont judge them - I judge myself

For being left in the dark

They, put a spanner in the works

They made a move although it hurts

And they know it and they cant help thinking

What it would be like correctly steered

If we had simply persevered

And just taken a step back from 'the ordinary'

Though altruism gets to me

Its a virtue cant you see?

That when i let it rest, on my conscience

It leads to feelings of remorse

And then those feelings go off course

And they mess up my head and I go ranting

But I dont blame them - I blame myself

For getting so attached that I cant let go

I dont judge them - I judge myself

For being left in the dark

I cant change them, cant change myself

I just get so worked up over things I cant control

I wont bother, I tell myself

Then make another, sly remark