Tug Of War

Momma praying for me

Grandma praying for me

Satan preying on me

Jesus waiting on me

'Cause I've been straddling the fence it's time to make decisions

I've been thinking about heaven lately, don't think I'll get in

'Cause I've been going back and forth I love the way I'm living

But I hate it at the same time 'cause I know I'm sinning!

And I don't want to be like them hypocritical christians

So I stay away from Jesus completely 'till I'm ready to give him

Everything, but that seems like it'll never happen

My girl coming over later, you know what's about to happen

Then after some smashing I'm sitting there asking

If eternity in hell is worth some moments of this satisfaction

Man I'm so back and forth!

I'm back and forth like a tug of war

I've been fighting for my life, like I'm trying to get my life right

And I really want more, and I don't know

Back and forth like a tug of war

And I've been fighting for control, and fighting for my soul and this is war

I've got two choices

Both require pain

One's the pain of change or the pain of staying the same

One of them leads to joy

Other one leads to shame

One of them leads to freedom the other one keeps me in chains

I wear a cross and give you thanks for my blessings! Ain't that enough?!

Why you want everything?! Can't you leave this part of my life untouched?!

I thought following you meant I only had to say yes once!

Now every day I wake up you give me some cross to take up!

You really want me to break up with my girl? Now that's too much...

I know what's best for me!

You don't understand my complexities!

See I gotta make a living so don't ask where my checks come from!

Now I hear you talking, I ain't gone numb!

I know I'm in the dark and I gotta find my way to the son, 'cause

He calling on my name and I know I can't run...

I'm so back and forth...

I'm back and forth like a tug of war

I've been fighting for my life, like I'm trying to get my life right

And I really want more, and I don't know

Back and forth like a tug of war

And I've been fighting for control, and fighting for my soul and this is war

I drown on broken hearts

A man full of regrets

The thrill has left, the empty promises of sin sets

You wanna put treasure inside my hands, but you cease

'Cause they're clamped, holding on the sins I won't release

I don't know how to start loving you, and stop doing what I'm doing if I gain you tell me what I'm really losing

You have to change me and my sins I'd never choose him

My heart needs to see something greater than what I'm pursuing so

Is it true that you give rest to the weary? Can you accept and repair me?

Do you hear me? It's so clear and now it's painfully apparent

That I can't have my sin and my savior, they're not for sharing

Anything that I lose to follow you is not a loss

My girlfriend my friends my money even my job

But sometimes I believe the lie

That god don't provide for his child when they obey, that's so cray

He calling me to freedom, I think that it's time to walk

I don't see every step but the next is out of the dark

I'm the filthiest of them all, but I'm yours if you wash me!

From that sin, by the blood of that cross!

I'm yours