Having Fun is Bad for You

I used to go to all the parties

And make love to all the beautiful ladies

And I'd eat cheeseburgers with bacon and extra grease when I was

hungry

And drink Windex Colladas until my skin turned blue

But now,the times they are a-changing

My lifestyle, it is rearranging

For debauchery may be fun and entertaining

But it is also very bad for you

Do you know how many diseases you can get

Making love to someone who has not had all their tests

So nowadays, I am celibate

And I wear a condom, in case I have dirty thoughts

I never drive my car past the speed limit

And I always wear my seat belt when I am in it

I traded my Lambourghini for a Honda Civic

Because it is more fuel-efficient and practical

Ay-yi-yi! Ay-yi-yo!

Being boring is the way to go!

Ay-yi-yi! Ay-yi-yo!

Having fun is bad for you!

I can no longer smoke my cigarettes

Because I found that they are a major cause of death

The tar and nicotine have not killed me yet

But if I got pregnant, they could hurt my baby

I used to love my sorry complexion (sorry?)

I tanned myself to perfection

But the sun can give you a cancerous infection

So now I'm white and pasty and I never leave the house

I used to eat like there was no tomorrow

But then I found cholesterol is full of sorrow

The last thing I want to do is to have to borrow

Somebody else's heart, because mine is full of fatty deposits

Ay-yi-yi! Ay-yi-yo!

Being boring is the way to go!

Ay-yi-yi! Ay-yi-yo!

Having fun is bad for you!

Having fun is bad for you!