Sexual Happening

Viv : Some folk like to call it friggin'

Fornicatin', jig-a-jiggin',

Hide the sausage, slap-and-tickle or a lay,

Shaftin', shaggin', screwin', humpin',

Rumpy-pumpy, pumpy-pumpin',

Bangin', bonkin', rogerin' your end away.

But I call it

A beautiful mem'ry

The deed of joy

A sexual happening

Bodies touching, got no clothes on

That nice tingle, skin together

Viv/Young Viv : No more kid's stuff, it's the real thing

Young Viv : Now the world looks very different

It's a place of sexual happenings

Just waiting out there for me

I can cha-cha, I can rhumba

Now at last I've got your number

'Cos I'm thinking just the same as you

Doing the dance of love

Once I felt like Cinderella

Now I'd polka any fella

Any fella that I bump into

Doing the dance of love

Doing the dance

Doing the dance

Doing the

Doing

Doin' the dance ev'rybody does

Doin' the dance

Doing the dance

Doing the

Doing it

Doing

Doin' the dance, the dance of love

There's a million men in Leeds

And some are flowers, some are weeds

But the whole damn blooming shipment

Has the necess'ry equipment

That can satisfy my needs

Wanna tell the whole damn street

Now that I've lost it, I'm complete

I don't know about the tango

But it sure takes two to bang-o!

Come and dance me off

Me feet

I'm doing the dance

Doing the dance

Doing the

Doing

Doin' the dance ev'rybody does

Doin' the dance

Doing the dance

Doing the

Doing it

Doing

Doin' the dance, the dance of love

Good-day complete total stranger

What would you be like in bed?

What would you look like

Stark-bollock naked?

These are the questions that pop in my head

D'you know, complete total stranger,

I watched you when you walked by

I like a nice bottom

And fellas that's got 'em

And you qualify

Complete total stranger

I'm doing the dance

Doing the dance

I'm doing the

Doing it

Doing

Doin' the dance ev'rybody does

Doin' the dance

Doing the dance

Doing the

Doing it

Doing

Doin' the dance

Doing it

Doing

Doin' the dance

Doing it

Doing

Doin' the dance, the dance of love

Viv : Second time were disappointing

Not exciting, like the first time

His report read "must try harder"

Young Viv : Where's the romance?

Matt : That were nice love.

Young Viv : There'll be other sexual happenings

But I won't be seeing him again

Viv : famous last words!