Meant to Turn You On Not Crack You Up

I meant to make you dinner but I burned the steak

So I booked a restaurant but we got there late

So we both had to settle for some curley fries

Extra value menu at least it was super sized

I meant to turn you on not crack you up

I wish I knew just what it took to fill your loving cup

I wanted to put my moves on ya but im fresh outta luck

I meant to turn you on not crack you up

I meant to light the candles when the curtains caught fire

when I tried to put it out I tripped on some speaker wire

I thought I'd make it better with a sexy dance

When I did my one two step I ripped my pants

I put my arm around you and poked you in the eye

I went in for a kiss and my bad breath made you cry

I turned down the bed and we were almost there

Until you got a glance at my ole holy underwear