Hey Ladies

(Hey) Hey ladies in the place, I'm callin' out to ya

There never was a city kid truer and bluer

There's more to me than you'll ever know

And I got more hits than Sadaharu Oh

Tom Thumb, Tom Cushman, or Tom Foolery

Date women on TV with the help of Chuck Woolery

Words flowin' out just like the Grand Canyon

And I'm always out lookin' for a female companion

I threw the lasso around the tallest one and dragged her to the crib

I took off her moccasins and put on the bib

Wheelin' and dealin', I make a little bit of a stealin'

I'll bring you back to the place and your dress I'm peelin'

Your body's on time and your mind is appealin'

Starin' at the cracks up there up on the ceilin'

Such and such will be the bass that I'm throwin'

I'm talking to a girl, telling her I'm all-knowing

Well, she's talking to the kid (who to the kid)

I'm telling her every lie that you know that I never did

Hey ladies, get funky

All the ladies in the house

The ladies, the ladies

Well, me in the corner with a good-lookin' daughter

I dropped my drawers and said: Welcome back Kotter

We was cuttin' up the rug, she started cuttin' up the carpet

In my apartment, I begged her please stop it

The gift of gab is the gift that I have

And that girl ain't nothin' but a crab

Educated: no, stupid: yep

And when I say stupid, I mean stupid fresh

I'm not James At 15 or Chachi in charge

I'm Adam, and I'm adamant about livin' large

With the white sassoons and the looks that kill

Makin' love in the back of my Coupe De Ville

I met a little cutie, she was all hopped up on zootie

I liked the little cutie, but I kicked her in the booty

Cause I don't kinda go for that messin' around

You be listenin' to my records', a number one sound

Step, step to the rhythm, step, step to the rhyme

I've got an open mind so why don't you all get inside

Tune in, turn on, to my tune that's live

Ladies flock like bees to a hive

Hey ladies, get funky

Hey, hey, hey, hey, ladies

Girls, girls

Hey, hey, hey, hey, ladies

One more time, ain't it funky now

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, ladies

Ain't it funky now (You know that)

She's got a gold tooth, you know she's hardcore

She'll show you a good time, then she'll show you the door

Break up with your girl, it ended in tears

Vincent van Gogh, go and mail that ear

I call her in the middle of the night when I'm drinkin'

The phone booth on the corner is damp, and it's stinkin'

She said come on over, it was me that she missed

I threw that trash can through her window 'cause you know I got dissed

Your old lady left you, and you went insane

You blew yourself up in the back of the 6 Train

Well, take my advice at any price

A gorilla like your mother is mighty weak, man

Suckin' down pints 'til I didn't know

Woke up in the morning with the Won Ton Ho

'Cause I announce, I like girls that bounce

With the weight that pays about a pound per ounce

Girls with curls, and big long locks

And beatnik chicks, just wearing their smocks

Walkin' high and mighty like she's number one

She thinks she's the passionate one

Hey ladies, get funky

What's that?

Good god

Good god, dance

Good god

Baby, baby, baby, baby

Ain't it funky, brother?

He, ha, ha, ha

Hey, hey, hey, hey, ladies

Hey, hey, ladies