Fistfight At The Wafflehouse

Six foot two and a mouth full of chew

And a trucker hat that said john deere

He was dousing his eggs in ketchup

Smelling like whiskey and beer

In came a five foot red head

And threw hot coffee in his face

He went down with her on his back

And they began clearing the place

Fistfight at the waffle house

Don't try to hide from an angry green eyed spouse

You're in the only places that's open past 3am

Don't try to play her for a fool

She was first in her class at cosmetology school

After four long months of marriage

You would think they might figure it out

But it was just like their senior prom night

Fistfightin' at the waffle house

He covered up his face rolled up in a ball like an armadillo on the dirty floor

She had her knee on his gullet and yanking on his mullet

They have been in this position before

With a coffee cup in one hand

She rolled him underneath the booth

She swung it back and i can hear it crack

And she chipped his last good tooth

Fistfight at the waffle house

Don't try to hide from an angry teenage spouse.

She left the engine running and the baby sleeping out in the car

She was crying when she laid into him

Mascara running down her ache ridden cystal meth skin

You can smell the lice medication in her hair

The curse words flying from her mouth

It was just like her wedding night

Firstfightin' at the waffle house

She was quick as a cat

She did it so many times

You would think her hands woulda got sore

When we thought it would end

She started hitting him again

And telling him what it was for

This is for the time you got drunk on wine and wrecked our new used car

This is for the time you hocked my wedding ring to get some ones for the titty bar

And this is for making me live in shack with four pit bulls and your drunken brother tom

And this is for the time you drink a bottle of jack

And started kissing on my mom

Fistfight at the waffle house

She bit his lenard skynard tattoo and he passed out

Then she hopped into her nova and drove it away!

Her torn halter top was ling on the floor

He picked it up and staggered out that door

Climbed up on his tractor and followed her home just as meek as a mouse

But they'll be back next saturday night

Fistfight at the waffle house

Fistfight at the waffle house

Fistfight at the waffle house

Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah