Cheech And Chong
Lyric guide

Hey Masterbater

Read Hey Masterbater lyrics by Cheech And Chong on LyroVerse, with linked artist context and related song paths.

Cheech And Chong visibility1 visits
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Page type: lyric reference Artist: Cheech And Chong Canonical path: /cheech-and-chong/hey-masterbater Related lyric paths: 6
Lyrics

Hey Masterbater

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Sitting in my house, and I know that I'm alone,

Feeling kinda horny got a tingle in my bone,

Go and get my pants off and a picture of Sharen Stone!

Heeeey Masterbater!

I go a little faster and it's feeling kinda nice,

Once aint enough so I had to do it twice,

If you want to spank the monkey,

I can give you good advice!

Heeeey Masterbater!

(Female moans, reaching climax)

I use some baby oil or a little vassiline,

Layin down a towel so I keep my carpet clean,

Never shake my hand cuz you don't know where it's beeen!

Heeeey Masterbater!

I do it in my car when I'm drivin down the street,

One hand on the wheel the other on my meat,

Can't get out of the car cuz I'm stickin to the seat!

Heeeey Masterbater!

(Man moans, goat baaa's, and man moans more)

Since I was a kid I have been a Masterbater,

Choke the chicken, holdin the knob, squeezin the tomata,

I flipped to Miss November, now I'm gonna decorate her!

Heeeey Masterbater!

Buffin the banana, missle lissin, shakin bakin,

Poundin on the Flounder, and it's mayanaise I'm makin,

Spank the frank, whack the carrot, got my hand a dakein!

HEEEEY MASTERBATER!

(Both man and woman moaning til end)

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Who performs "Hey Masterbater"?

Cheech And Chong performs "Hey Masterbater", and this lyric page sits inside the Cheech And Chong catalog on LyroVerse.

Are there related songs to explore after "Hey Masterbater"?

Yes. The related section below points to The Reefer Song and (How I Spent My Summer Vacation) Or A Day At The Beach With Pedro & Man with a short reason for opening each page next.

Where can I find more songs by Cheech And Chong?

Use the artist link near the top of the page or the related paths section below to keep moving through Cheech And Chong's lyric pages.

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