Page type: lyric reference
Artist: Dane Cook
Canonical path: /dane-cook/simon-said
Related lyric paths: 6
Video embedded: yes
Lyric guide
Simon Said
Read Simon Said lyrics by Dane Cook on LyroVerse, with linked artist context and related song paths.
person
Curated by Ethan Walker
LyroVerse team
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Lyrics
Simon Said
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If you shaved your beard, and put on a dress, you'd be a great female impersonator
And if you win this contest, we will have failed
Don't mean to be rude, but you look like the Hulk's wife
Simon said
Simon said
The things that Simon said
Simon, we can tell that you were born this season
Your face was the same one that I make every time I watch the Real Housewives of New Jersey
And Simon, you have the honesty of Abe Lincoln, and the charm of the guy who shot him (3, 4! )
Did you take singing lessons? Do you have a lawyer? Then you should sue your teacher
You sounded like Sher after she's been to the dentist
Did you really think you could win American Idol? You must be deaf
Simon said
Simon said
The things that Simon said
Simon said
Simon said
The things that Simon said
Simon says no so often that when he says yes it's because someone just asked him if he said no
You are the inspiration for people everywhere who want to be told they suck on TV in front of millions of people
But let's not forget the other judges
(Randy) Yo dog, I don't know man, it was a little bit pitchy, it was not good for me, I was like "WHAT!"
(Ellen) That was, uh, it was, it was really great, you look like you're, uh, having a good time up there it was great
(Karen) You've gotten lost in this competition, find out what kind of artist you are, you can win this whole thing right now
Now let's hear it from Ryan, after the break
I assume there was no mirror in your dressing room tonight
You've invented a new form of torture
You came across like a background singer for a background singer
I'm sorry, there's bad, then there is you
Simon said
Simon said
The things that Simon said
Simon said
Simon said
The things that Simon said
Simon said (You know you said it)
Simon said (You know you said it)
The things that Simon said
The things that Simon said
The things that Simon said
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Who performs "Simon Said"?
Dane Cook performs "Simon Said", and this lyric page sits inside the Dane Cook catalog on LyroVerse.
Are there related songs to explore after "Simon Said"?
Yes. The related section below points to Parking Structure and Five Sisters with a short reason for opening each page next.
Where can I find more songs by Dane Cook?
Use the artist link near the top of the page or the related paths section below to keep moving through Dane Cook's lyric pages.
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