Kalhöun

It's the magic word they claim, came down from ancient Babylon

When the tower of Babel crumbled, and the language was all wrong

The natives were confused and yet, they understood one word

Now it's on display in a mall museum, down in south Pittsburgh

Kalhöun!, everybody cry Kalhöun!

Some preacher says it's the first word, that Adam said to Eve

Religious tracts and bulletins note, "Speak it and believe"

Some say it's just deception, empty and absurd

While the elect say the last times, were triggered by the word

Kalhöun!, yeah everybody sing Kalhöun!

Don't know exactly what it means

It's just a sacred kinda thing - Kalhöun!

Now when carpenters hit their thumbs

They'll yell out loud the "Kalhöun!" curse

And the faithful flock to pa, to bow to Lord Kalhöun the first

He says "Messiah's in the dessert", but a few of us won't go

We're going down to the Kalhöun church, to pray it isn't so

Kalhöun!, is the thing - now everybody sing Kalhöun!

And even the president says it's a miracle

"Kalhöun" the nation cries, "You're a miracle"

On baseball cards, beer, and cars and cereal

Kalhöun is the word, now everybody's heard - Kalhöun!

Some politician has an idea to take a million men

Go downtown Los Angeles and build the tower again

Why nothing can stop us this time, we'll mount the word on high

Spell K-A-L-H-Ö-U-N across the steel grey sky