My Dad Is Rich

Alright, you can try to fuck with me

But before you do, there's something you should probably know

I keep that motherfuckin' thing on me and by thing I mean dad

Trust, you don't wanna make me mad 'cause I got him on speed dial

And he's rich as all heck

And he's strong, he'll be comin' for your neck

Yeah, my dad is straight evil, he's a mafia boss

And he's cutting me checks, now I'm lost in the sauce

Give me an arbitrary job cause I have no skills

Nepotism got me making them bills

First grade I had a bully, he was straight dissin'

Asked the principle for help, but he wouldn't listen

Told my dad, next day they were both missin'

Like Shape of Water they were sleeping with fishes

And did I mention he's a vampire? My dad can't die

Paler than a motherfuckin' overcast sky

Only comin' out at night, killin' folks with one bite

Think he sucks? Well, you goddamn right

Me and dad at the ball park, hittin' balls with a bat

If you bully me, you're gonna brawl with a bat

Who needs a sugar daddy when you got a sugar dad?

Unlimited allowance, no cap

Dad been alive for 400 years, vampire shit

He don't show up in the mirrors, rich man shit

He don't show up for his kids

How he live forever, but ain't got time for his kids?

But it's cool

I get that money from the top (bitch)

Call that trickle down economics

You don't wanna mess with me, I promise

The money never stops, but it's got a lot of commas

If I have a bad dream, then I'm hoppin' in his coffin

Dad's richer than Jeff Bezos

It ain't fall, but he's raking up pesos

Puttin' all my haters underneath gravestones

I'm like a baby mouse 'cause he feed me queso, little bread like panko

You will never have a rich dad

You will always have a tiny baby. Bitch dad

You could have money in the bank, but your dad can't hang

'Cause he ain't got fangs, and he don't leave gangs, bitch