Boy Wanted

Verse:

I've just finished writing an advertisement

Calling for a boy.

No half-hearted Romeo or flirt is meant;

That's the kind I'd not employ.

Though anybody interested can apply,

He must know a thing to qualify.

For instance:

Refrain 1:

Teddy:

He must be able to dance.

he must make life a romance.

I said a boy wanted,

One who can smile;

Boy wanted,

Lovable style.

He must be tender and true,

And he must know how to woo.

I know we'll get acquainted mighty soon,

Out in a garden 'neath a harvest moon;

And if he proves to be the right little laddie,

I'll make him glad

He'll answer my ad!

Refrain 2:

Toots:

To be the boy of my choice,

He needn't own a Rolls Royce.

The kind of boy wanted*

Needn't have gold;

Boy wanted,

Mustn't be cold.

If he has oodles of charm,

I'll even life on a farm.

if he fits into my picture of a home,

I'll be so nice he'll never have to roam.**

Yes, if he proves to be the right little laddie,

I'll make him glad

He answered my ad.

Refrain 3:

Babe:

He must like musical shows,

And he must wear snappy clothes.

Yes, that is my story,

And to it I'll stick;

There's no glory

In having a hick.

He must know how to say "Yes!"***

When I look at a new dress.

Oh, I'll be ready when the right one calls,

And I'll start vamping him until he falls;

And if he subsidises me, oh, sweet daddy!

I'll make him glad

He answered my ad!

Refrain 4:

Bunny:

The movies he must avoid,

He'll know his Nietzsche and Freud.

I said a boy wanted,

One who knows books;

Boy wanted

Needn't have looks.

He must be such a saint,

But, Oh! he dassent say 'ain't.'

I don't care if his bankroll totals naught,

For we can live on love and food for thought.

If he's a scholar, when I see him I'll holler,

'My lad, I'm glad

You answered my ad!'

*Alternative version of this line: 'The sort of boy wanted'

** Alternative version of this line: 'I'll be so nice he'll nevercare

to roam'

*** Alternative version of refrain 3, lines 7-8:

'And so his boots mustn't squeak;

And he must love like a sheik.'

Primrose Version:

Verse:

I've just finished writing an advertisement

Calling for a boy.

No half-hearted Romeo or flirt is meant;

That's the kind I won't employ.

Though anybody interested can apply,

He must know a thing to qualify.

For instance:

Refrain 1:

To have a ghost of a chance,

He must be able to dance.

The sort of boy wanted

Must have a smile

Boy wanted,

Lovable style.

He must be tender and true,

And if he knows what to do,

I think I'll learn to love him very soon;

I'll want him morning, night and afternoon.

So if you know of one who's wanting employment,

Just tell him that

I'm wanting a boy!

Refrain 2:

To be the boy of my choice,

He's got to own a Rolls Royce.

He must be quite reckless

Buying me things:

Pearl necklace,

Diamond rings.

He must be ready to pay

A dozen bills ev'ry day.

I'll simply smothing him with tender care

If I could find a multimillionaire.

So if you could seen one dining at the Savoy-oh!

Just tell him

I'm wanting a boy!

Refrain 3:

I won't have anyone small,

He must be handsome and tall.

I said a boy wanted,

Beautifully dressed;

Boy wanted,

Trousers well pressed.

He must have wonderful eyes;

He must wear wonderful ties.

I want a boy who'll always look as though

He's only just come out of Savile Row.

So if some Paris wants a Helen of Troy-oh!

Just tell him that

I'm wanting a boy.