Can't Talk Dirty

I can't talk dirty though I know it turned you on

You said I better start or you'd be gone

I got too shy and didn't know what I should say

Can't help thinking that there was another way

I should have done it like a politician

Criticize your policy

Not mention my position

Brought a mike, announced it play-by-play

There's the pass, deep in the zone

But is it in? Let's see the replay

What if I had tried reading aloud

With a book behind the pillow

I need light, is that allowed?

I should have done it like an auctioneer

'Cause I need one, do I see two?

Do I see three? Okay, that's weird

Imagine all the things I could have tried

Instead of giving up and saying that I

Can't talk dirty, I can't talk dirty, yeah

I can't talk dirty, I can't talk dirty, no

I can't talk dirty, I can't talk dirty, yeah

I can't talk dirty

I should have done it like a movie pitch

'Cause it has action! It has romance!

It's just dialogue with tits

I should have studied for it like an oral exam

Crib notes on my palm to questions

I don't understand

I should have done it like I was the police

Brought a flashlight, got confessions

Better than I was a priest

I should have done it as if I were condemned

My final words were blasphemies

About you and your friend

Imagine all the things I could have tried

Instead of giving up and saying that I

Can't talk dirty, I can't talk dirty, yeah

I can't talk dirty, I can't talk dirty, no

I can't talk dirty, I can't talk dirty, yeah

I can't talk dirty

I should have done it like I had tourette's

That way if I went too far, you couldn't

Really get upset

I should have done it like I was a mime

'Cause I can't talk inside this box

But here's a rope to climb

I should have made it more like a debate

'Cause my point's pretty good but your

Rebuttal sure is great

I should have done it in a limerick

'Cause I'm a poet, didn't know it

Til I tried to rhyme with prick

Imagine all the things I could have tried

Instead of giving up and saying that I

Can't talk dirty, I can't talk dirty, yeah

I can't talk dirty, I can't talk dirty, no

I can't talk dirty, I can't talk dirty, yeah

I can't talk dirty