Guttermouth
Lyric guide

Jamie's Petting Zoo

Read Jamie's Petting Zoo lyrics by Guttermouth on LyroVerse, with linked artist context and related song paths.

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Page type: lyric reference Artist: Guttermouth Canonical path: /guttermouth/jamie-s-petting-zoo Related lyric paths: 6
Lyrics

Jamie's Petting Zoo

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I've had my pet

Since I was nine years old

I loved him and fed him

But one day he attacked

I knew he didn't love me back

So I grabbed him like a football

And punted fifty yards

Now I hate pets

Take yourself to the vet

Now I hate pets

Dolphins trapped in little nets

Now I hate pets

You little fucking

Screaming shit-bag

I should of let your mother

Eat you, little fucker

So I got a little birdy

And I trained it everyday

He knew 1000 words

But then he flew away

But then I got him back

The fucker wouldn't shut his trap

So I took him to the bathroom

And rubbed his beak in shit

Now I hate pets

Spotted owls in their nests

Now I hate pets

Bagged a deer and made a vest

Now I hate pets

Birds and bees and bears and bison

Pigs and parrots and pandas

I fucking hate them all!!!

I was walking through the park

When a snake peered from his hole

A perfect opportunity

To take the bastard home

I chopped his fucking head off

With my handy garden hoe

And made a lovely hat-band

For my redneck cousin Bo, heee-haaw!

Now I hate pets

10,000 volts to the chest

Now I hate pets

Fed my cat some cigarettes

Now I hate pets

You little fucking

Screaming shit-bag

bastard

Fuck you, you

Fucking pig-shit licker, fuck!!!!!!

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Who performs "Jamie's Petting Zoo"?

Guttermouth performs "Jamie's Petting Zoo", and this lyric page sits inside the Guttermouth catalog on LyroVerse.

Are there related songs to explore after "Jamie's Petting Zoo"?

Yes. The related section below points to 1,2,3 Slam and 1-2-3-4 with a short reason for opening each page next.

Where can I find more songs by Guttermouth?

Use the artist link near the top of the page or the related paths section below to keep moving through Guttermouth's lyric pages.

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