Fitter Stoke Has a Bath

You don't suspect my life's a mess

You prob'ly think it's groovy

Meeting people everyday

See some place abroad

And I admit that when the time is right

It can be quite a laugh

But you know, that's not often

Eventually, I think that you will agree

I'm only putting lines out

And shifting gears, missing years disappear

And as for you, I couldn't bear to think of it

They said you were Swedish

You asked me for a chocolate bar

Then you went and spoiled it all by eating it

What a pain, what a nause!

You can imagine my delight

Was like some R. Crumb magazine come to life

Thank you ladies you had us all

I hope you both enjoyed it

But just the same

I'm happy just to sit around at home

With Pamela making cups of tea and washing clothes

Now anyone could easily see

I'm basically a cretin

Bing billy bong - silly song's going wrong

Ping pong ping, clong cling dong

Tie me up, turn me on

Bing billy bang, desperate dan, frying pan

Cling clong cling, bong bing bang, Michael Miles, bogey man