1 2 3 Apple Tree

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Oh, when you call me weird names and make all kinds of weird faces,

When you drive me along to all the stupidest places.

You know it's not fair, but you know what you do,

Because you know how bad I like to be with you.

And then you're like: "David, it's like one, two, three",

As you're climbing barefoot on the apple tree,

It is as sweet as me, and as good as new,

And you know how bad I like to be with you.

You should try to go to some place, honey,

Where the weather is hot, and the music is funny.

You should try down south, by the magic Bayou,

And you will know how bad I like to be with you.

It's like the better path, and it's a better way,

If we never part, and if we never stray.

If we know we have each other to hang on to,

And if you know how bad I like to be with you.

When I'm home alone, and when I'm traveling far,

When I'm riding my bike and when I'm driving in my car,

It could be England or it could be Peru,

And you would know how bad I like to be with you.

Well you know better than me on all kinds of topics,

Like what fruit is native, what fruit is exotic.

You know the right names for flowers and for animals too,

I hope you know how bad I like to be with you.

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Well, you play the trumpet and I play drums,

You smoke cigarettes and I chew gum,

You say we're different and I believe it's true,

Because you know how bad I like to be with you.

It's not even an option,

It's not a matter of choice.

I could say it with words,

And I could say it with my voice.

I could sing it in a song or play it on a kazoo,

And you would know how bad I like to be with you.

You say you dye your hair black since you were seventeen,

And you say it goes well with your eyes so green.

Well, I'm losing my hair and my eyes are blue,

You know how bad I like to be with you.

And now you think you're puzzled,

And you don't understand me.

Well, you can play me as easy as a DVD,

It's like solving a case with a single clue,

To know how bad i like to be with you.

You know I'll always like you no matter what.

And if you get a little chubby,

And if you're a little too fat,

If you worship Jesus when I am a Jew,

Then you will know how bad I like to be with you.

And you know how people shorten other people's names,

To show their affection,

Like, if you called me Ray, if my name was Raymond.

Well, your name ain't Susan but I would call you Sue,

To show you how bad I like to be with you.

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