British Things

I love to be a British queen

I am Victoria, you see

Now where's my British butler

With my British cup of tea?

Tea is not from Britain, ma'am

From India it was brought

Yes, for your cuppa, thousands died

And many wars were fought

British things, my British things

It seems that tea is not

British things, my British things

Can I sweeten it a jot?

Do tell me sugar's British though

No, it's Caribbean imported

For sugar in your cup of tea

Slavery's been supported

I know it's wrong, your majesty

But slaves in Africa

Worked hard in fields of sugar cane

To sweeten up your char

British things, ah British things

I thought that there were many

British things, ah British things

Afraid there's hardly any

You know your British cotton vest

What's wrong with it? Explain!

The cotton's from America

And picked by... slaves again!

Your empire's built on fighting wars

That's how your income's swollen

Your British things are from abroad

And most are frankly stolen

Whatever next? Go on! Pray tell!

Our British queen is foreign as well?

It's true, I am of foreign descent

And your husband, Albert? A German gent!

At least I've got a British name

Victoria's Latin... that's a shame!

British things, ah British things

There are none, we declare

All our favourite British things

Seem to come from elsewhere!