No Me Diga

[DANIELA]

Gorgeous!

[CARLA]

Linda!

[CARLA/DANIELA]

Tell me something I don’t know!

[VANESSA]

Vieja!

[DANIELA]

Sucia!

[CARLA]

Cabrona!

[CARLA/VANESSA/DANIELA]

Tell me something I don’t know!

[CARLA]

A little off the top!

[DANIELA]

A little off the side!

[NINA]

A little bit of news you’ve heard around the barrio!

[ALL]

Tell me something I don’t know!

[DANIELA]

Bueno

You didn’t hear it from me!

But some little birdie told me

Usnavi had sex with Yolanda!

[NINA/CARLA]

No me diga!

[VANESSA]

Ay, no! He’d never go out with a skank like that!

Please tell me you’re joking!

[DANIELA]

Okay!

Just wanted to see what you’d say!

[CARLA, spoken]

Oh ho, Dani!

[CARLA/NINA/DANIELA]

Tell me something I don’t know!

Mmm-hmm-mmm

[VANESSA, spoken]

What? I don’t care!

[ALL]

Ay, bendito!

[DANIELA]

So, Nina, I hear you been talking to Benny

[NINA]

And what do you hear?

[DANIELA]

I hear plenty!

They say he’s got quite a big… Taxi!

[CARLA/VANESSA]

No me diga!

[NINA]

Okay! I don’t wanna know where you heard all that!

[CARLA]

I don’t think I know what you mean

[DANIELA]

Carla! He’s packing a stretch limousine!

[VANESSA/DANIELA/NINA]

Tell me something I don’t know!

[CARLA]

Long as he keeps it clean!

[NINA/VANESSA/DANIELA]

Ay dios mio!

[DANIELA]

Nina, seriously, we knew you’d be the one to make it out!

[VANESSA]

I bet you impressed them all out west

You were always the best, no doubt!

[CARLA]

We want front row seats to your graduation—

[DANIELA]

They’ll call your name—

[DANIELA/CARLA/VANESSA]

And we’ll scream and shout!

[They cheer]

[NINA, spoken]

You guys, I dropped out. ​

[DANIELA/CARLA/VANESSA, spoken]

No me diga?!

[NINA, spoken]

I should go. ​

[DANIELA, spoken]

Well, that’s a shitty piece of news. ​

[CARLA, spoken]

That girl never quit anything. ​

[VANESSA, spoken]

What the hell happened?

[DANIELA]

I don’t know

[DANIELA/CARLA]

I don’t know

[DANIELA]

I don’t know

[CARLA/VANESSA]

Tell me something I don’t know!

[ALL]

Qué sé yo?