Bewitched, Bothered and Bewildered

After one whole quart of brandy

Like a daisy I awake

With no Bromo Seltzer handy,

I don't even shake.

Men are not a new sensation;

I've done pretty well, I think.

But this half-pint imitation

Put me on the blink

I'm wild again

Beguiled again

A simpering, whimpering child again

Bewitched, bothered and bewildered am I

Couldn't sleep

And wouldn't sleep

Until I could sleep where I shouldn't sleep

Bewitched, bothered and bewildered am I

Lost my heart but what of it?

My mistake I agree.

He's a laugh, but I like it

Because the laugh's on me.

A pill he is

But still he is

All mine and I'll keep him until he is

Bewitched, bothered and bewildered

Like me.

Seen a lot

I mean I lot

But now I'm like sweet seventeen a lot

Bewitched, bothered and bewildered am I

I'll sing to him

Each spring to him

And worship the trousers that cling to him

Bewitched, bothered and bewildered am I

When he talks he is seeking

Words to get off his chest.

Horizontally speaking

He's at his very best.

Vexed again

Perplexed again

Thank God I can't be over-sexed again

Bewitched, bothered and bewildered am I

Wise at last

My eyes at last

Are cutting you down to your size at last

Bewitched, bothered and bewildered no more

Burned a lot

But learned a lot

And now you are broke, though you earned a lot

Bewitched, bothered and bewildered no more

Couldn't eat

Was dyspeptic

Life was so hard to bear;

Now my heart's antiseptic

Since you moved out of there

Romance-Finis

Your chance-finis

Those ants that invaded my pants-finis

Bewitched, bothered and bewildered no more.