Different Love

It go - off of my sabbatical

Took a few years cause slaughter is what I had to do

Which only brings me to now and I ought to be erratical

I say that cause my autobiographical is more so just a graph of you

I ain't mad, you did more than what I asked of you

As for me, I did less than what I could've

So though we were a hit I had to cancel that show

And now my standing solo, I'll be amped when she not a ho

But what you doing right now is real commendable

Take strength to do

Cause between us there's some deep root stare

I gave you the best dick you ever got in your life

And stupid me thought it would be enough to keep you there

I thought you loved football

I was running through the hole with the stiff arm

But got disarmed, guess it was just harm

I ain't need to fuck, I was looking for a peer

They say once you stop looking what you looking for appears

You were stronger than I pictured you, much stronger than me

And almost just as strong as john

And john, oh, that's just a friend of my moms

With tubes coming out his nose, but shit I never knew why

But he was born with his heart in the right side of his chest

No, for real, his heart is in the right side of his chest

Doctors confused, they must do what they can do

But impute and say it ain't on the right side of his chest

Scared he might die in his sleep, deep

Every time he coughs wonders if it's a cough or a symptom

Us will get better later

He gon' live his whole life waking up every morning to a respirator

So I don't never say what I can't do

If he can be happy with life than nigga I can too

While jose wanna die

Ain't tell nobody, but eyeing his eyes feel I should probably identify

I said everyday he lives with pain and want to end it

Something's wired wrong in your brain, you gotta mend it

Had a bad breakup and let it expose dude

But if she was getting you high then she would get you low too

So who's there to wait on me?

Y'all just get it off y'all and put the weight on me

Nigga look me in my eyes, it was amazing to me

And said she don't understand you not as crazy as me

You got God, nigga, I'm the most mentally flawed nigga

You not even built to withstand what all I've endured, nigga

You know shit about the thoughts in my head

Or the strength I need daily just to get out of bed

Just to open my eyes, nigga, open your eyes

The words spoken of wise, you just know it in disguise

We can end this right here, I got nothing more to say to you

You ain't never met another fucking nigga crazier

Blank stare, couldn't believe 'em

Cat chastised me cause I got help when you need some

I can give less than a fuck and not a damn

I never be apologetic over who I am

I'm the same me, nothing changes when the riches do

But niggas wanna suck you dry just like the bitches do

They enter your mentions, sucks to be the center of attention

When you can't even center your attention

Yeah, so I'm fucking out of frustration

They love every second and accuse me of persuasion

Jam was a cancer to me, I had to rid it

Red got in her feelings fast, but won't admit it

Dawn I was bored then, never really smithen

V got threatened by the thought of competition

Malo wanna fuck all day, don't know how

She why I got a viagra in my wallet right now

Step kept it simple, loved me for my mental

B got a nigga, but she used me as her rental

And you, you just give me resistance

Say you needed comfort zone, for you it's distance

I tell 'em all I'm not available emotionally

They start giving me advice like they coaching me

I don't even ask it

It's something about bipolar sociopath shit

They just find it attractive

Yeah, anti-social, but I mingle now

But I've been arguing much more since I've been single, how?

Tell me is this a relationship or just a fuckship?

Whatever situation it is it's all fuck shift

I'll admit it, I might love her a bit differently

As for them they'll all love to see a different me

Some cried to me, some are begging for it

Someone'll see that change, but not be present for it

You just act so frightened

Ignoring all logic now, she won't buy in

Even in your absence my feelings are heightened

Though I know some love's lost, it's not on my end

It's not mine, it's not mine at all