The Truth

I started bein' honest with myself

Havin' conversations that weren't very easy, I need help

Three words never thought I'd speak

But here we are, Xanax bars

Started poppin' them to cope, then got addicted

Started thinkin' that I'd probably die alone

See this life is way too fast for me

I'm in the same career where half my colleagues turn to casualties

Know y'all got those R.I.P tweets up in the drafts ready to go-

For the moment that I finally take too much and overdose

Always thinkin' 'bout my fathеr burstin' into my apartment

Just to see his only son overdosin' on the carpеt

Flashin' back to every memory of when I was a kid-

While he makes a final speech before he closes up the lid

I couldn't do it anymore, flush the rest and went to war

I'm gettin' sober I'm takin' my spot

Back and shut the door on my addiction

I hope you listen

'Cause everything I write from here on out is my prescription

Yeah, that's the mission

All this fame is overrated, over what man? I been stressed

All these fake people started to surround me and my friends

I don't need that energy, I don't let those demons in

Finally startin' therapy, now it's time to reinvent, uh

I got demons (Josh we know that you got demons)

They been schemin', plottin' on my head and they control my feelins'

They make death sound so appealin'

But I keep on movin' 'cause I don't wanna give up

I been workin' I been zonin' I been craftin' up this masterpiece

Is it time where I top everyone that's out here passin' me

You want the old Josh, I think we found him

Shook his cage and set him loose

'Bout to take over, they just don't have a clue, yeah

Thought I was done, that was just the beginnin'

I'm takin' my sound and now I'm reinventin' it

Push my limits, said no more gimmicks

I'm treatin' my music like my final minutes

Until I hit that self destruct, this is my only motive

Gotta be focused, I'm locked and loaded

Explosive, I'm so devoted

You said that you wanna break rap, I been there (Already done that)

But they would never care if you never read or say somethin'

Never been through the mud, never read your day once

Tell you that you changed up, 'cause you got your pay up

And as I been climbin' the ladder, circle gets smaller

I'm sadder, enemies spawnin'

I'm flattered but I guess none of it matters

Feels like I don't have no one

Around me to tell me that I been messin' up

So I just rely upon myself to learn

There's lessons of countin' my blessins'

Countin' money is like countin' my stresses

Less I got of one, the less I got of the other

My demons pullin' me under

So guess I'm just testin' the suffer

Rather not be great, 'cause all the great ones plunder

It's easier to get high

It's easier to let go of the things that hurt you again

It's easier to get drunk

It's easier to drink up when your pain goes on, now I know