Now Hiring At Freddy's

Hey there, pal!

Looking for work?

But sick of being pushed around by lousy bosses?

How would you like to run and manage your own business?

Well, all we need is a little paperwork and your soul

Become a Fazbear franchisee

You're more than family, you're the star

We've got a little fixer upper for you

There's lots of work here to do, so let's start

Cut some corners if it makes you a profit

I promise you're gonna go far

Frozen Pizza's the best

Not one ingredient's fresh

But just tell the customer they are

All these animatronics have made us so famous

They've got a history, almost all of it's heinous

But they make us so much money how could anyone blame us?

Salvage all the old ones, shouldn't be dangerous

I've heard a frontal lobe removal's rather painless

Better that to happen than for us to go bankrupt

And remember if you ever get hurt on the job

Unfortunately, corporate cannot cover your loss

Come on down to Freddy's and we'll make a tycoon of you

Invest all of your savings cuz you're gonna double it soon

Minimize the casualties and please just don't get us sued

Every shift will be fun, if you get your duties done

And clean all the blood off your shoes

Just kidding

It's only marinara, you nincompoop

But, accidents do occasionally happen

Here are some precautionary instructions in case of a mishap

Entertainment upgrades have a price

Minor injuries are a workplace sacrifice

With the animatronics you always want to play nice

And keep a safe distance, that's solid advice

Oh, children love to play, boy, can they make a mess

We know how much you'd love to strangle them by their necks

Just tell those little brats to give Freddy a hug

And when it's done sweep whatever's left of them under the rug

Because a bad reputation cannot be afforded

Don't get rid of the problem just get rid of the corpses

Sanitation is of strictly minimal importance

And if Police are at the door make sure they've got proper warrants

Ethics and Morals are completely subjective

As long as you prosper you need nothing corrected

If anything breaks don't sweat, trainwreck

We'll just take it out of your next paycheck

Come on down to Freddy's

You oughta stay for a while

If any children go missing

Just don't let that go on file

Don't get any blood on the carpet it's easier

Cleaning the tile and if a kid ends up dead kill

All the witnesses next and make sure it's done with a smile

Now what?

You want a raise?

Maybe, after another couple days

Order more decorations to cover the walls with

And take remaining appendages out of the ball pits

When bodies start rotting you'll know for sure

Take your mind off it with another high score

Then we'll have a performance you and Freddy

Together at this family franchise that'll go on forever!

Come on down to Freddy's

We'll suck the soul out of you

A workshift can be deadly but we'll bring you back to life soon

Maximize the casualties

At this point we're gonna get sued

And before you can leave clean all the carpets with bleach

And we'll make a monster of you