Julie Andrews
Lyric guide

The Physician

Read The Physician lyrics by Julie Andrews on LyroVerse, with linked artist context and related song paths.

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Page type: lyric reference Artist: Julie Andrews Canonical path: /julie-andrews/the-physician Related lyric paths: 6
Lyrics

The Physician

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They're no good

They never treat a woman like

Like they should

I've known then from Bombay to Senegal

But there's one in particular

That I recall

Once I loved such a shattering physician

Quite the best-looking doctor in the state

He looked after my physical condition

And his bedside manner was great

He said my bronchial tubes were entrancing

My epiglottis filled him with glee

He simply loved my larynx

And went wild about my pharynx

But he never said he loved me

He said my epidermis was darling

And found my blood as blue as could be

He went through wild ecstatics,

When I showed him my lymphatics

But he never said he loved me

And though no doubt

It was not very smart of me

I kept on racking my soul

To figure out

Why he loved every part of me

And yet not me as a whole

With my esophagus, he was ravished

Enthusiastic to a degree

He said 'twas just enormous

My appendix vermiformis

But he never said he loved me

He said my vertebrae was sehr schön

He called my coccyx plus, que gentil

He murmured, "Molto bella"

When I sat on his patella

But he never said he loved me

He took a fleeting look at my thorax

And started singing slightly off-key

He cried, "May heaven strike us"

When I played my umbilicus

But he never said he loved me

He seemed amused

When he first made a test of me

To further his medical art

-Yes?

Yet he refused

When he'd fixed up the rest of me

To cure that ache in my heart

And so he lingered on until morning

Yet when I tried to pay him his fee

-Yes?

He said, "Why, don't be funny, It is I who owe you money"

- But he never said...

He said he really thought a lot

Of my medulla oblongata

And my pancreas and sternum

Made him sing a wild cantata

When I shook my pelvic girdle

Well, he did a double hurdle

-Your appendix?

Just tremendous

- Cerebellum?

Simply swell-um

- But he never said...

He loved my sinuses and spleen

And every organ in between

And yet he never said he loved me

Ahhh...

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Who performs "The Physician"?

Julie Andrews performs "The Physician", and this lyric page sits inside the Julie Andrews catalog on LyroVerse.

Are there related songs to explore after "The Physician"?

Yes. The related section below points to Feed The Birds and So Long, Farewell with a short reason for opening each page next.

Where can I find more songs by Julie Andrews?

Use the artist link near the top of the page or the related paths section below to keep moving through Julie Andrews's lyric pages.

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