I Wonder

That's right—I got problems and personal issues

Stories that'll make ya eyes tear and wet tissue

It's true, I'm Madd like the rapper

I'm so upset I gotta put it up in my rap before I snapper

After the things I've seen from Atlanta to Queens

To the mean streets of Brooklyn when I was a teen

Back and forth to the Islands, scream when I left

But adapted, and still my dreams haven't left

I only hung with the crack kids we not the best

Me and the roughest ruffnecks went chest to chest

Now my best friend's locked up north, I won't rest

Till I let him live his dream through me and I confess

That even though both our hearts was dark his was darker

Best believe when shit got spark he was the sparker

And when the block got hot he was the fire starter

And if I had beef my nigga Raja was a martyr

I wonder how certain people come in my life

I wonder why'd I get in so many fights

I wonder why sometimes things just don't go right

Why I gotta live this life, hey, hey

I wonder how certain people come in my life

I wonder why'd I get in so many fights

I wonder why I gotta live this life, hey, hey

Yo, you one of the most important people in my life

They called you Dice, but I called you cousin

We was buggin' 'cause I figured that we both had something in common

You loved to chat reggae music and I loved rhymin'

But still they ain't call you Dice for nothin'

I seen you shoot with the williest cats and leave them with nothing

Somethin' must have pleased that bluffer in you

To make you wanna take dough from those tougher than you

Throughout school we made money together

When you was on the floor shootin', I was the side better

And yo we cleaned out them cats and took the scraps

But you wasn't a ruff cat and cats knew that

I knew eventually them thugs would try to hurt you

If I was there, I'd never let nobody hurt you, it's hurtful

I knew they wouldn't let you take the money and run

That's why I shoulda came when you told me to come

I wonder how certain people come in my life

I wonder why'd I get in so many fights

I wonder why I gotta live this life, hey, hey

I wonder how certain things don't go right

I wonder why'd I get in so many fights

I wonder why I gotta live this life, hey, hey

Yo, it was June sixth 96 Graduation night

Made it through the school shish shootin' dice gettin' in fights

I even sparked a riot, till the school got quiet

And dismiss just got tired of usin' my fists

We had some shit like knife pipes bottles and sticks

Can't forget them 380's, Nine's and 22's

Best believe, many dudes was paid in my crew

We made a name for ourselves boy I've seen some drama

Seems my momma never dreamed she'd go threw so much trauma comma, pause you

Ask about cops and laws

Well that shit don't exist when you black and poor

So we broke em, but at that night my heart got broken

Chokin' on the weed smoke, drinkin' rum and gettin' open

Not to mention, never a big drinker I'm a thinker

But I'm thinkin' hey this my night, pass me more liquor

Fight breaks out, I'm just too nice to get in it

But my brother got stabbed and I missed it

Word up, it's crazy

Why I gotta live this life (wonder) hey, hey

I wonder why sometimes things just don't go right

I wonder why certain people come in my life

I wonder, yeah, why I gotta live this life, hey, hey

I wonder why sometimes things just don't go right

I wonder why'd I get in so many fights

I wonder: Hey, why I gotta live this life, hey, hey

I wonder why sometimes things just don't go right

I wonder why I gotta live this life

I wonder why I gotta live this life, ay, ay, uh, ay

That's right, your life