Dress Rehearsal Rag

Four o'clock in the afternoon

And I didn't feel like very much

I said to myself: Where are you golden boy

Where is your famous golden touch?

I thought you knew where

All of the elephants lie down

I thought you were the crown prince

Of all the wheels in Ivory Town

Just take a look at your body now

There's nothing much to save

And a bitter voice in the mirror cries

Hey, prince, you need a shave

Now if you can manage to get

Your trembling fingers to behave

Why don't you try unwrapping

A stainless steel razor blade?

That's right, it's come to this

Yes it's come to this

And wasn't it a long way down

Wasn't it a strange way down?

There's no hot water

And the cold is running thin

Well, what do you expect from

The kind of places you've been living in?

Don't drink from that cup

It's all caked and cracked along the rim

That's not the electric light, my friend

That is your vision growing dim

Cover up your face with soap, there

Now you're Santa Claus

And you've got a gift for anyone

Who will give you his applause

I thought you were a racing man

Ah, but you couldn't take the pace

That's a funeral in the mirror

And it's stopping at your face

That's right, it's come to this

Yes it's come to this

And wasn't it a long way down

Ah wasn't it a strange way down?

Once there was a path

And a girl with chestnut hair

And you passed the summers

Picking all of the berries that grew there

There were times she was a woman

Oh, there were times she was just a child

And you held her in the shadows

Where the raspberries grow wild

And you climbed the twilight mountains

And you sang about the view

And everywhere that you wandered

Love seemed to go along with you

That's a hard one to remember

Yes it makes you clench your fist

And then the veins stand out like highways

All along your wrist

And yes it's come to this

It's come to this

And wasn't it a long way down

Wasn't it a strange way down?

You can still find a job

Go out and talk to a friend

On the back of every magazine

There are those coupons you can send

Why don't you join the rosicrucians

They can give you back your hope

You can find your love with diagrams

On a plain brown envelope

But you've used up all your coupons

Except the one that seems

To be written on your wrist

Along with several thousand dreams

Now Santa Claus comes forward

That's a razor in his mit

And he puts on his dark glasses

And he shows you where to hit

And then the cameras pan

The stand in stunt man

Dress rehearsal rag

It's just the dress rehearsal rag

You know this dress rehearsal rag

It's just a dress rehearsal rag