In All Honesty

While staring at the ceiling

I was overwhelmed by the feeling

I am certain that i am alone.

And i thought about how vast this universe must be

And why there's so much suffering in this world.

And the only thing i have is a pen and this broken voice

To scream into the nothing of this night.

And i asked myself the question: do you ever think that you'll be saved?

And i, i answered back:

"no. who the fuck do you think is going to save you now?

When you can't love anything, especially yourself..."

Then suddenly an indifference to this world

And everything took over me.

Because i thought that this would change over time

But as usual i was wrong.

Maybe this is why i can't breathe at night.

And maybe this is why people cry:

Because we're all a vast mistake that universe made when it unwillingly entered life.

And if by chance you're one of the lucky ones, save yourself.

Because the rest of us are doomed to a life of solitude.

There is nothing left in this world for me.