The Drunken Acoustic Emo Song

Its not funny

My life is turning

Into a giant shitstorm everyday

Its like waking up in the morning

And hitting myself in the face

With a brick over and over

And over and over and over and over

And over and over and over and over

Again

Until i go to sleep that night

At which point

I wish someone would strangle me

In my sleep

Strangle me in my sleep

(his sleep, his sleep

His sleep sleep sleepy time

Sleep, his sleep oh yeah, his sleep

His sleep sleep sleepy time

Sleep)

All i do when i'm alone

Is think about a girl

Who ate my heart (oh my god)

All i do when i'm alone

Is think about ways to spear my head off

The rest of my body

And when i'm alone sometimes

I think about what it would be like

To be an animal in the forest

And never have to deal with anything

Like shit like this

(any of the shit, any of the shit shit shit

The shit shit shit)

This is my love song

To a girl

You've made me feel like shit (made me feel like shit)

For the last two and a half years

I hope you're happy...(hope youre happy)

I hope you die (hope you die a slow painful death)

I hope your breasts are chopped off

By a monkey with a cleaver and a helmet

...what happened to your boobs?

(what happened to your boobs?)

Where did they go?

I don't know. (theyre gone)

I'll tell you one thing though (theyre gone)

I wish that it would snow.

What do you think about that, bo?

(i would have to say

The boobies are gone

The boobies are gone)

So in short

Thank you for making my life miserable (miserable)

The last two years (the last two years)

I've wanted to wake up everyday

And hack my own nutsack off with a spork

(self-mutilation, with a spork)

And every night i fall asleep

I wish that i was fucking dead (he wishes he was dead)

I wish i could get images of you out of my head

(out of my fuckin head)

But unfotunatly it makes me

Wanna drive my car into a chestnut tree

And i don't know what the fuck

Is wrong with me

(dont know what the fuck is wrong with me)

What the fuck is wrong with me?

(he's got vaginitis)

Vaginitis

(vagnitis)

Vaginitis

(vagnitis)

This is the song that will never end

It just goes on and on my friend

Some people started singing it,

Not knowing what it was

But they'll continue singing it forever just because...

This is the song that doesn't (you fuckin bitch)

It just goes on and on my friend

Some people started singing it,

Not knowing what it was

But they'll continue singing it forever just because...

This is the song that doesn't end

It just goes on and on my friend

Some people started singing it,

Not knowing what it was

And they'll continue singing it forever just because...

This is the song

(this is the song)

I fuckin hate you

(he fuckin hates you)

Spear through your forehead

(through your forehead)

Shot with a gun

(40 caliber)

Dismembered with a reuben

(something that jeffrey dahlmer would have done)

They dont use them any more, medieval times

(outlawed but you get the point)

Cigarettes put out on your eyes

(camel filters)

(you're getting a little morbid here, chris, but keep it going)

It's not funny (not very humorous)

To make fun of me

(i'm not making fun of you, i'm making fun of...)

My life's a tragedy

(not one of those shakespearean ones)

It's not funny (not humourous)

To make fun of me (--- poking fun at chris)

My life's a tragedy (his life is nothing more than piss)

Won't someone please kill me? (somebody, somebody)

I'm so fucking happy (fuckin happy)

Wont you please kill me?

My life's a tragedy

I'm fuckin happy

My life's a tragedy

Won't someone kill me?

My life's a tragedy

Won't someone kill me?

I'm waiting for someone to hit me in the face

Alright we're going to do the sing along now

(alright what are we singing?)

I'll do the first two verses

Then you guys just follow along

(i'm going to add my own)

Somebody kill me

My life's a tragedy

I'm no longer happy

Somebody kill me

Somebody kill me

My life's a tragedy

I'm no longer happy (whoo-ooh)

So wont someone kill me?

Wont someone kill me?

My life's a tragedy

I'm no longer happy

So wont someone kill me

(everybody!)

Wont someone kill me?

My life's a tragedy

I'm no longer happy

So wont someone kill me?

(in spanish!)

Someone kill me

My life's a tragedy (el tragedy)

I'm no longer happy (los happy)

(aw dude, that was so nasty)

Wont someone kill me?

My life's a tragedy

I'm no longer happy (happy)

So wont someone kill me?

I wish you were dead

I wish you burned up (starting at the head)

In flames...and...stuff

You fuckin bitch

Ahhh!

I wish you were dead

Same chord over and over

Not a problem

Youre right eye looks like you have gonnorhea

(i do)