How To Say No (Indulgence Yunkie)

This is the price mother

The lie I am won't stand much longer

Their laughter is growing huge

And monstrous devouring the sky

I believed to be above

Now I realize I was always under

This was only the end of the page

The last cigarette, another mistake

To wipe out from my bed

Hummingbirds below the blankets

Shake their wings in your lover's ashes

That Sun went blind and eyes grew

To your new light, to wipe all fear away

Into the game again, knees, elbows, heart ablaze

Too many layers of paint, over my childish ways

Too many broken smiles, before this even starts

Into the game again, I didn't even say yes

You speak of gratitude

But I ain't getting nothing in return

The fox took for granted and the hare

Sharpened its teeth and claws and said

You may have won this land, but, wait

Who gave you power over my name?

I see your gun charged, I lost the gaze

Into those eyes so briefly blessed

Until the light completely fades

Until the last chance is erased

And I could love you like the girl I was before

The tiny wars of hate came bombing down

To carve my trench

Where trust and lust became the game I knew too well

And in my bed, became the poison on which I fed

And I will rise up, again and again

And I will rise up, ignore the stain

(You disown what I built, I deny what I feel

And the countdown as wrong as four, one, three)