The Three Songs

Oh there once was a man

Who was looking for a wife

And he knew what he had in mind:

A pretty little thing

That would love him all his life.

He knew not what he would find.

So he went to an inn

And they kindly let him in

At the sign of the Lion's Den.

A girl he would see;

She was probably a three

On a scale from one to ten.

So he ordered him a beer;

But his vision still was clear

So he ordered up one pint more.

When it past his lips

He was staring at her hips,

And decided she was probably a four.

Well, when that pint was through

He decided for to woo

And near to her he came.

And since she was alive

She was probably a five,

So he asked her for her name.

Well, she looked him in the eye

But she gave him no reply

And they brought him a glass of wine.

He was really in a fix;

she was looking like a six,

And he said, "Will you be mine?"

After drink eleven

She was looking like a seven.

In fact, she was really great.

After one more round,

Surprisingly he found

He was sitting with an eight.

When he asked her to dine

He was sure she was a nine

So he reached for his ring, and then

He drank another ale,

Thought his love would never fail,

And he praised her as a ten.

So, now he has a wife

Who will love him all his life

And a long life it will be.

When the ale had cleared his head

He wished that he was dead

Cause he married a minus three.