The Mermaid Song

Chorus:

Roll your fin over and look out to sea

Young lassie that's where that I think you should be

It's not that I don't think you're pretty, I do

But in bed with you dear I just haven't a clue

With her long blond hair and her big grey eyes…

Wait a minute… Grey eyes?

Yea, it was kind of weird

In a sexy sort of way

Her washboard abs and her scale laden thighs…

Scale laden thighs?

That's disgusting mate.

She swam at our keel with the greatest of ease

A natural acrobat of the seas

Acrobat eh? What'd she do, flips and turns and

dives?

Like a dolphin.

Yea, and you should've seen her in the bedroom

Like a fish out of water I bet

Flopping around and what-not

Chorus

With an hour glass figure I couldn't resist

And hair that flowed over her milky white…

Shoulders?

Yea, something like that.

With beauty I'd not yet seen in my life

You need to get out more, mate.

I took a fish home and made her my wife.

You're a sick man!

Chorus

Happy and married honeymoon we did go

I tailed her my flipper and took her in tow

You did what?

I started to have me way with her

Showed her your bait and tackle did you

Wait a minute, she's a fish!

Yea, well that's where it got a bit tricky.

I tried and I tried, didn't know what to do

I hadn't yet thought it that far through

That's the first thing I thought of

Yea, me too

We making love is all that I wished

Try that with half human half fish

Ohhhh

Chorus

Now that she's gone, I really miss her

I long for her touch, and longing to kiss her.

Ah, cheer up mate. There's other fish in the sea.

You're a real funny guy

If I had her again I'd go one more round

And this time I'd have her go…..

See, now you're thinking mate.

Chorus x2:

Bah, mermaids. Can't swim with'em, can't live

with'em

Perhaps you should raise your standards

You know, I heard that mermaids can change to

humans anytime they want.

What?!

No, no, actually that's true, they just can't turn back

into mermaids after that.

She never told me that

Never trust a fish, mate.

Come on guys, how am I going to get her back?

I don't know, throw out a line?

Dangle your bait and tackle?

You know, I think I was with a mermaid once.

What do you mean you think. You don't know?

Well… she smelled fishy.

Ohhhhhhhhh

What?