Let's Call The Whole Thing Off

Things have come to a pretty pass

Our romance is growing flat

For you like this and the other

While I go for this and that

Goodness knows what the end will be

Oh, I don't know where I'm at

It looks as if we two will never be one

Something must be done

You say either and I say eyether

You say neither and I say nyther

Either, eyether, neither, nyther

Let's call the whole thing off

You like potato and I like potatoe

You like tomato and I like tomatoe

Potato, potatoe, tomato, tomatoe

Let's call the whole thing off

But oh! If we call the whole thing off

Then we must part

And oh! If we ever part

Then that might break my heart

So, if you like pyjamas and I like pyjahmas

I'll wear pyjamas and give up pyjahmas

For we know we need each other

So we better call the calling off off

Let's call the whole thing off

You say laughter and I say lawfter

You say after and I say awfter

Laughter, lawfter, after, awfter

Let's call the whole thing off

You like vanilla and I like vanella

You, say s'parilla and I say s'parella

Vanilla, vanella, chocolate, strawberry

Let's call the whole thing off

But oh! If we call the whole thing off

Then we must part

And oh! If we ever part

Then that might break my heart

So, if you go for oysters and I go for ersters

I'll order oysters and cancel the ersters

For we know we need each other

So we better call the calling off off

Let's call the whole thing off