I'm a Transvest-lite

I first heard Frank say

He wanted to dress like Fay Wray

I wanted that too but what could I do

In junior high school in LA?

My heart skipped in the scene

He said you gotta be it, not just dream

It was a taboo I knew I wouldn't pursue

I didn't have the self-esteem

I gotta confess that I like to cross dress

And I've been doing it since I was 13

It's hard to tell bros that you wear women's clothes

Even in the “open-minded” punk scene

You'd probably get hurt in heels and a skirt

When you're in the middle of a circle pit

So I'd only wear panties under boxers to keep it all a secret

Now I'm telling everyone 'cause it's fun and I don't give a shit

Forward 30 years

I still had the same fears

Then I saw Hedwig play at Bilgewater's gig

And I felt the same envy and tears

I decided right there

I can't be bothered to care

What other people think, I'm gonna dye my pubes pink

And throw out all my Hanes underwear

I'm not transgender, I'm a lazy crossdresser

Who thinks makeup is too much of an ordeal

I paint my toes and wear shiny tight clothes

Not for the look, but how it makes me feel

I don't need things just right, I'm a tranvest-lite

I only shave to do the Time Warp midnight Saturday

I'm done with self-pity, I don't have to feel shitty

'Cause I wanna look pretty, so I give it the old city College try

Don't get me wrong, I still wanna be a guy

Who sometimes likes to dress like a girl

(He sometimes likes to wear diamonds and pearls)

Don't think I don't know I'm not fooling anyone

(He's a cross between Adele and Charlie Chaplin)

You gotta know it's not just girls who just wanna have fun!