Ruiner

It's the young Edgar Allan spitting live from the basement

Do it for the love, give a fuck about the payment

If I'm being honest, I don't know what I'm chasing

Need a space to place my thoughts and the songs the location

I'm fucking sick of writing all these sad songs

But I'm just being real, it's how I feel, word is bond

I just wanna let you know you're not alone

That I know what it's like when you never leave your home

When you can't get out of bed, can't even check your phone

Can't even lift your head, like your bones are made of stone

When everyone you know is asking why you're feeling low

But you can't tell 'em why, 'cause you don't even know

I got radio execs tryna say what's best

I got pressure coming down, got me overly stressed

I got suicidal thoughts floating thru my head

I got people from the past probably hoping I'm dead

Oh no, what's your mama gonna say

When I tell her that I broke your heart?

It's just things aren't the way that they used to be

Oh no, now you're crying on the bathroom floor

And I guess it's the end

Well I lost my mind, then I lost my best friend

Yeah, so what if I did and what if I didn't?

I just wish I wasn't stuck between decisions

I just wish I didn't feel like something's missing

I just need to get outside this mental prison

3am and I'm stuck in a rut

Seems like every time I leave I end up thinking of us

I keep fucking with your head like a lobotomy

I lost it all and you'll always be a part of me

And can you feel the pain when you wake up?

Late again and it's dark out

I don't even know where it came from

Can't escape, got me feeling down

I remember days in the hometown

Things change when you come around

Now they're just memories now

Keep feeling up, then I feel down

Oh no, what's your mama gonna say

When I tell her that I broke your heart?

It's just things aren't the way that they used to be

Oh no, now you're crying on the bathroom floor

And I guess it's the end

Well I lost my mind, then I lost my best friend