The Ross Perot Guide To Answering Embarrassing Questions

When something in my history is found,

Which contradicts the views that I propound,

Or shows that I perhaps am not the guy

I claim to be, here's what I usually do:

[Chorus (after each verse):]

I lie.

I simply boldly falsify.

I look the other feller in the eye,

And just deny, deny, deny.

I don't apologize. Not me. Instead,

I say I never said the things I said.

Nor did the things some people saw me do

When confronted by some things they know are true.

I hate the weasel words some slickies use

To blur the past or muddy up their views.

Not me. I'm blunt. One thing that makes me great

Is that I'll never dodge, or obfuscate.