What Little Girls Are For

Five years old, Dirty room

Here he comes, nowhere to hide

But inside closed eyes, shrinking away

Maybe he won't see me,

Legs squeezed tight, but not tight enough

It's never enough to keep him out

There in the dirty room

He shows me just what little girls are for

Caught in a slide, Caught in a prison

Nowhere to hide, legs squeezed tight

He shows me just what little girls are for

And I'm not here anymore

Fourteen years old, Alone with him

Guilt and promises in another dirty room

"If you really love me ....I promise we'll take it slow"

I guess he might have meant it - until I said no

Legs squeezed tight, but not tight enough

It's never enough to keep him out

Lying there with eyes closed tight

It'll be over soon if I don't put up a fight

Where the pain ends

Is where I begin

Scars are hidden deep within

Where only memories remain

I can tell you my secrets

But the pain is my own

It's always a reminder

Of what little girls are for

So I learned I was never worth as much

As when I was down on my knees

Or giving away these pieces of me

Silent screams in my head

Until I don't know who I am

I fear that I may have nothing left to give

As I'm taking them in

I'm losing myself to the wind

And my cries to god fall on silent ears

Now I know for sure just what little girls are for

And I'm not here,

And I'm not here,

And I'm not here anymore

Twenty-three years old, Alone in the car

Except for him as he shuts the door

I'm suddenly reminded what I am for

With eyes closed tight as I'm spinning

Legs squeezed tight

But not tight enough, it's never enough to keep him out

Oh Please God...Not again,

Another piece of me that's empty and dead

Where the pain ends Caught in the slide

Is where I begin Caught in a prison

Scars are hidden deep within Nowhere to hide

Where only memories remain Legs squeezed tight

I can tell you my secrets And he shows me

But the pain is my own What little girls are for

Always a reminder And I'm not here

Of what little girls are for Not here anymore

Thirty years old and you're in my life

And you're so different from all the rest

The words from your lips tell me I'm worth so much more than I know

And maybe someday soon I'll believe

Your words can save me, erase these old stains

And help me to pick up the pieces of me

And maybe I'll find some redemption

And maybe someday soon I will find forgiveness for all my sins

And give me some room to come undone and find myself again

I am here ... I am here somewhere