Alive

Alive, I felt I was alive

The room shook under his nervous steps

I wished to not open my eyes, anymore

In my house everything was unfamiliar

Wasn't him, wasn't his fury on my bones

I was wrong; I could make amend the problem that I had created

And I still hung, with my nails and all my memories

I was less than the idea he had about me

While I kept telling myself "I just have to wait for it to pass"

The hell was mine but I needed to

Believe, since I still breathed

I could never be more blessed than this, oh no

In my house everything was unfamiliar

Wasn't him, wasn't his fury on my bones

I was wrong, I could make amend the problem that I had created

When words hurt more than a whole night with him

My son shadow turns me back to forgive

With a fast rewind, I forgot any wounds on my raped mind

And your dreams, who knows where are now

And my dreams had fallen down to resist

In my house everything was unfamiliar

He was, and was his fury on my bones

I knew I couldn't make amend the problem that I didn't create

The main effort, to admit that I had really failed

That I'd known the most degrading misery

To discover that I could deserve more than a daily dread