Bob Rivers
Lyric guide

The No Smoking Song

Read The No Smoking Song lyrics by Bob Rivers on LyroVerse, with linked artist context and related song paths.

Bob Rivers visibility0 visits
person Curated by Ethan Walker LyroVerse team
Reference snapshot

The page facts to cite before the commentary

Use this page for the lyric text, linked artist context, and any LyroVerse editor's note attached to the song. Listener comments remain user-generated and should not be treated as the primary source.

Page type: lyric reference Artist: Bob Rivers Canonical path: /rivers-bob/the-no-smoking-song Related lyric paths: 6
Lyrics

The No Smoking Song

The lyric stays readable and compact here; the note and related paths sit nearby so you do not lose the song while looking for context.

I aye aye aye aye

A lady that I know works in an office all day

She used a smokeless ashtray with a fan

When she was told it was no longer okay

They had to pry the Camels from her hand

They said no no no no

You can�t smoke here no more

Your lucky you can still smoke outdoors

It causes disease

And makes your co-workers sneeze

And anyway it�s now against the law

A man once had a yen for Oriental Cuisine

At the finest Chinese restaurant in the land

When he lit up the waiter let out a scream

And smashed it out in his moo goo guy pan

No no no no you can�t smoke here no more

We�re tired of rakin� buts off the floor

He said no smokin� please

And something rude in Chinese

You go now, chop chop chop

Eww It stinks here anyways

Aye aye aye aye aye

A man I know just got a flight from Sand Diego

They said you cannot smoke until we land

He couldn�t do without his Marlboro

The locked him for smoking in the can

They said no no no no

You can�t smoke here no more

We told you when you first came on board

It causes disease and makes the passengers wheeze

And anyway it�s now against the law

Quick answers

What this page can answer fast

Who performs "The No Smoking Song"?

Bob Rivers performs "The No Smoking Song", and this lyric page sits inside the Bob Rivers catalog on LyroVerse.

Are there related songs to explore after "The No Smoking Song"?

Yes. The related section below points to Mr. Magoo and Oxycontin Eater with a short reason for opening each page next.

Where can I find more songs by Bob Rivers?

Use the artist link near the top of the page or the related paths section below to keep moving through Bob Rivers's lyric pages.

Song Room

Interpretations, questions, and corrections for this song

Interpretations, questions, memories, and correction notes live together here. The room stays noindex while the best insights are reviewed.

Open Song Room
0 followers Selected insights only surface after moderation
Listener comments

What people are saying

0 comments
Add a short interpretation or memory

A strong comment here is specific: the phrase you keep hearing, the mood you come back for, or the reason this song stays in rotation.

Sign in to post the first listener note. Reporting stays open to everyone.

No listener comments on The No Smoking Song yet.