Page type: lyric reference
Artist: S.J.Tucker
Canonical path: /sjtucker/ballad-of-the-boy-cat
Related lyric paths: 6
Video embedded: yes
Lyric guide
Ballad Of The Boy Cat
Read Ballad Of The Boy Cat lyrics by S.J.Tucker on LyroVerse, with linked artist context and related song paths.
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Curated by Ethan Walker
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Lyrics
Ballad Of The Boy Cat
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Our boy kitty Callan is overly male
He howls and he struts and he calls
Testosterone poisoning has turned off his brain
So now he just thinks with his balls.
Oh yow, ow, row-row-ow ow
Hey baby, come here and I’ll jump you
If it moves then I’ll screw it
There’s just nothin’ to it
If it don’t move, it’s easier still
Poor Callan’s so desperate for someone to love
That he doesn’t care much about gender
As long as it’s feline, he gives it a try
And implores them with words strong and tender:
Oh yow, ow, ow-row-row ow
Hey buddy, you mind if I jump you?
If it moves then I’ll screw it
There’s just nothin’ to it
If it don’t move, it’s easier still
Now Callan’s quit eating, his mind is on sex
He’s singing love songs to the sofa
Stuffed animals cringe when he enters the room
And he calls to them over and over:
Oh yow, ow, ow-row-row ow
Hey Teddy, stay put and I’ll jump you
If it moves then I’ll screw it
There’s just nothin’ to it
If it don’t move, it’s easier still
When a girl comes to visit, he turns on the charm
And he woos her with bravado and song
Then his hormones kick in and he jumps on her neck
Like a caveman he drags her along
Oh yow, row, ow-ow-row row
He sings with his mouth full of girl fur
Hey babe, just you wait
This is gonna be great
Don’t blink or you’ll miss the big moment
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Who performs "Ballad Of The Boy Cat"?
S.J.Tucker performs "Ballad Of The Boy Cat", and this lyric page sits inside the S.J.Tucker catalog on LyroVerse.
Are there related songs to explore after "Ballad Of The Boy Cat"?
Yes. The related section below points to Tori Day and Creature Of The Wood with a short reason for opening each page next.
Where can I find more songs by S.J.Tucker?
Use the artist link near the top of the page or the related paths section below to keep moving through S.J.Tucker's lyric pages.
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