Putting Ups With The Joneses

mr. jones has a little problem

if i had eyes i'd see that it was me

he's the size of a man with the potential of a boy

not what god had meant a child of its to be

i'm afraid that he'll amount to all of nothing

the joy of reading Yeats he'll never know

and in the rat race twirl

of our computer guided world

he stands no chance of winning

let alone to place or show so

lock him up and throw away the key boys

mr. jones is not like you or me

luck him up tight

cause if he had the chance he might

show us that we're wrong

and that's the one thing we can't be

oh no

mr. jones wanted to be married

it seemed like such a cute thing at the time

two peas in a pod, two of a kind

who never have to ask each other

"what's on your mind?"

it seemed a simple way to make them happy

and happy is such a simple way to be

and if the kept to themselves

like two books upon a shelf

the kind you judge by the cover

and never take the time to read

lock him up and throw away the key boys

mr. jones is not like you or me

luck him up tight

cause if he had the chance he might

show us that we're wrong

and that's the one thing we can't be

oh no

mr. jones and mrs. jones we're elated to inform you

though you've failed to meet the standards

we've a place where we'll reform you

it's a ways outside of town

but the distance has its uses

close enough to make the effort

far enough to make excuses

lock him up and throw away the key boys

mr. jones is not like you or me

luck him up tight

cause if he had the chance he might

show us that we're wrong

and that's the one thing we can't be

oh no

mrs. jones wants to have a baby

she says that as a woman its her right

yes we tried to tell her i guess that she forgot

when she and mr. jones were wed

the doctors tied the knot

why can't she just be happy in her own world

then we could all be happy here in ours

we could still help out

even go as far as to stop off

at teh safeway, and drop some pennies in the jar

lock her up and throw away the key boys

mrs. jones is not like you or me

luck him up tight

cause if she had the chance she might

show us that we're wrong

and that's the one thing we can't be

lock them up and throw away the key boys

the joneses are not like you or me

luck them up tight

cause if they had the chance they might

show us that we're wrong

and that's the one thing we can't be

oh no