Wun'erful, Wun'erful

Note LW is Lawrence Welk, -L is a Lemmon sister,

LS is the Lemmon Sisters, LL is Larry Looper,

SS is Stoney Stonedwell, AL is Alice Lean,

SM is sailor matey, SC is sailor captain

Note LW is done in a parody of Lawrence Welk's accent.

I will spell this phonetically in a few places

where it is important, but if I did it consistently,

LW would be unintelligible.

LW Thank you, thank you and good evening friends.

We're coming to you once again from the beautiful

Aragon Ballroom on Lick Pier at beautiful Santa

Monica Beach, California. We've been getting lots

of cards and letters from you folks out there in

television lant and we surely do thank you for...ah...

for...ah...for all the cards and letters from you

folks out there in television lant. Starting us off

tonight is our trio the Lemmon Sisters and

girls what are you going to sing?

-L We're going to sing Thank You For All Those Cards

and Letters You Folks Out There in Television Land.

LW Lant!

-L Lant

LW And now an appropriate number. A-wun and a-too and a-

LS Thank you for all those cards and letters

You folks in television lant

We wonder where this television lant is

Could it be a couple of miles from where Dinney Lant is

Oh, well never the less you guys and gals in

LW What is that noise there?

LS - bunch of palsy-walsies -

LW Oh, its the bubble machine. Turn off...just a moment...

I...hold it just a moment please...turn off the bubble

machine...please turn off the bubble. Thank you, Lemmon Sisters for that lovely number. Wunerful, wunerful. And now on with the show. Here's that man with the deep, deep voice,

Larry Looper. Larry, What are you going to sing for us, Larry?

LL I'm going to sing Thank You For All Those Cards and Letters.

LW I'm sorry, that number has been taken.

LL Well. Ill sing The Funny Old Hills then.

LW Good. A-wun and a-too and a-

LL I-

LW Hold it just a moment. The bubbles don't come till the end

of the program. Turn off the bubbles. Thank you Lar- thank you

Larry Looper, for that wunerful number. Now I would like to

play a short instrumental medley based on the names of girls.

A-wun and a-too...no...no, thats not it...thank you so very much. And now, here's that young man about town from the brass section, Stoney Stonedwell, to sing Please.

SS Please. Lend your little ears to my plea -

LW What is the matter with that machine. Here, hit it with your

horn...hit it...here...stick your mouthpiece in it there.

Wunerful, wunerful. And now on with the show. Here's our

champagne lady Alice Lean. Alice is going to sing

Moonlight and Shadows. A-wun and a-too and a-

Ladies and gentlemen, for the first time in twenty-five years

my popping finger is caught in my cheek. Will you give me a hand there, Alice...here, pull my arm...no, the other arm...just pull it...

pull it...thats it.

AL Moonlight and shadows and you in my arms

And the melody in the bamboo tree, my sweet

Even in shadows

LW Hold it, somebody stop the bubble machine. The whole ballroom is lathering up with bubbles. And now I can't see the cameras. Here, let me set that accordion down on the stage and I'll try to fix that. Bear with us, folks just a moment please. Gee, the time is running out and we haven't even played the polka. Wait a minute, boys, I didn't mean...hold it, Alice, don't polka on my accordion.

Gee, Dad, it was a Wurlitzer. Hit the theme, boys. And so its

goodnight from all the champagne... wheres the cameras...theres so many bubbles I can't...and so, friends, we...help, the whole ballroom is shoving off to sea...

SM Sure is a clear night, ain't it, Captain?

SC Yup, matey, these are the kind of nights when the sea plays

tricks on ye.

SM Yeah, I recollect one night off Singapore...

SC Tricks, I say, like that mirage off the port bow, now.

SM What?

SC See it there, kinda bubbly looking in the moonlight?

SM Oh, yeah. Gee, if I didn't know better, I'd say it looks

like the Aragon Ballroom.

SC Yeah...dee-deedee dee-dee dee dee dee-dee

SM Hey, thats a catchy chantey you're humming there, Captain. What is it?

SC Oh, I don't know. Just keeps running through my head.

SM Let's go below and catch a little shut-eye.

LW Help! Help! Wunerful, wunerful. Turn off the bubble machine.

Help...help...