I Want to Be Well

To think that I would die this time

Isolated in the room where the bed rises

Photographic ordinary people are everywhere

Extraordinary histories, ordinary histories, ordinary histories

I'll find sleep, I'll find peace

Or in death you'll sleep with me

To figure that it was my fault

Or so I've come to realize life is not about

Love with someone (ordinary people are everywhere)

Extraordinary people are, ordinary people are, ordinary people are

Everywhere you look, everywhere you turn

Illness is watching, waiting its turn

Did I go at it wrong?

Did I go intentionally to destroy me?

I'm suffering in noise I'm suffering in (touching ordinary body)

The burning from within the burning from with (ordinary hysteria)

I could not be at rest, I could not be at peace (extraordinary hysteria)

So do yourself a good, or do yourself a death from ordinary causes

Or do yourself a favor, or do yourself a death from ordinary causes

Illness likes to prey upon the lonely, prey upon the lonely

Wave goodbye, oh, I would rather be, but I would rather be fine

I want to be well, I want to be well

I want to be well, I want to be well

And I forgive you even

As you choke me that way

With the pill or demon

And the shrouded shalom

Under conversation

In tremendous weight of

A crowd of ages outside

Dressed for murder

I'm not fucking around

I'm not, I'm not, I'm not fucking around

And shall I kiss you even as you take me that way?

With the pill or demon as my body changes

Apparitions gone awry

They surround me, all sides

But from within I see an unholy change

I'm not fucking around

I'm not, I'm not, I'm not fucking around