Fearless

Calm down and take my time

I got to keep cool and then unwind

I got to stay sane and take a breath

I got to slow down and just relax

I try to persuade myself for real

I try to keep control of all my fears

I try to switch off and eventually turn aside

And I try but I know it's a waste of my time

Run away … run away

Need it - Do I - Try it - Will I - here

Want it - Can I - Got it …

Rejoice like others do

I want to let go and be just like you

I want to hang around while I think of nothing else

I want to be sun and not the rain

I cannot just stop this masquerade

I cannot accept that it's too late

I cannot lose my anxiety

But I try to find a place where I used to be me

I try to break out but I cannot succeed

I have to be strong but again I'm too weak

My senses are frail - so defenseless within

But though I'm afraid I will never give in

Coalitions of viciousness fade away and take up

All my weird sensations - wish I could just wake up

From my known improvised life to make up

My mind inside - will I just capitulate and give up?

Insufficiently wise and I don't know when I'll grow up

Myself compromised and the cracks now show up

In my own crystallized side to blow up

To vaporize but I'll never give up …

Within our heads so deep inside, within our depths - that's where they

hide And in our heads they're buried deep; and with these shades we

have to live