Why She Disappeared

When she fell, she fell apart

Cracked her bones on the pavement she once decorated

As a child with sidewalk chalk

When she crashed, her clothes disintegrated and blew away

With the winds that took all of her fair-weather friends

When she looked around, her skin was spattered with ink

Forming the words of a thousand voices

Echoes she heard even in her sleep

Whatever you say, it is not right

Whatever you do, it is not enough

Your kindness is fake

Your pain is manipulative

When she lay there on the ground

She dreamed of time machines and revenge

And a love that was really something

Not just the idea of something

When she finally rose, she rose slowly

Avoiding old haunts and sidestepping shiny pennies

Wary of phone calls and promises

Charmers, dandies and get-love-quick-schemes

When she stood, she stood with a desolate knowingness

Waded out into the dark, wild ocean up to her neck

Bathed in her brokenness

Said a prayer of gratitude for each chink in the armor

She never knew she needed

Standing broad-shouldered next to her

Was a love that was really something

Not just the idea of something

When she turned to go home

She heard the echoes of new words

May your heart remain breakable

But never by the same hand twice

And even louder

Without your past

You could never have arrived-

So wondrously and brutally

By design or some violent, exquisite happenstance

Here

And in the death of her reputation

She felt truly alive