To You, Contorionist

Your eyes push shards of glass to mince my defenses

I never thought I'd feel this way - memories haunting every breath

it frightens me to know I can never be rid of you

after a year, you still stir something in me

the hate has faded but the disgust remains.

I recall when only warmth and acceptance filled your eyes.

If I could understand - what turned you against me

if I could just understand - what hardened your stare into scorn

what was it worth to you - to turn me inside out?

You became he that we hated - left me with scarlet eyes

and an empty chest - its been a year and I still feel nauseous

brown eyes cut into me - parting once friendly flesh

I burned your pictures away - but I can't stop remember when

the city has not felt the same since

though your stare has hardened - this cold contempt makes me wonder

could an ounce of guilt boil in your blood?

This blood we shared - seeps from an ever present truth

a missing piece of my past - still makes me crawl the other way

no I can't forgive - as you embody my regret

you are the living proof - that I'll never ever trust again

I never really told you what you had meant to me

ere my lungs met the ire of your voracious mouth.

So now I walk alone through the ashes of our ties.

My mind flooding with memories of endless summer drives.

I'd love to talk with you to fully understand

what finally drove you to this choice - to smash my heart

but some things are better left unsaid.