Cousin Homer's Anything Goes Dance Hall

well i had a mini-battle with my baby last night

so i left her for the dance hall to make it all right

i grabbed a mini-bottle at the end of the bar

then lord have mercy i saw a movie star

now just who she was i couldn't see quite clear

but i saw her throwin' down shots through the smoke and the beer

just as i made it over to ask for her hand

well the dogs started howlin' as they struck up the band

hey ho, here i go

if you see my baby just let her know

i'm headed down the road

to a little dance hall where anything goes

well your mouth starts waterin' when you walk through the door

take in the smell of sawdust down on the floor

it doesn't matter where you come from, just where you are

just grab a pretty dance partner and a PBR

hey ho, here i go

if you see my baby just let her know

i'm headed down the road

to a little dance hall where anything goes

well the boys in the band are still out of tune

but they get 'em swinging from the rafters in the middle of june

so get yourself down to the finest hole in the wall

it's cousin homer's anything goes dance hall

hey ho, here i go

if you see my baby just let her know

i'm headed down the road

to a little dance hall where anything goes