Help Yourself

Even the devil was an angel 'fore he tried to rush the throne

Lord they threw him in hell there all alone

Now he makes a castle out of the sinner's bones

You'd be angry too, if you could never go home

Well now, i ain't no preacher no preacher man's son

I done some bad things but i like to have my fun

A thousand ways to heaven, a thousand ways to hell

Well i say, the good lord helps those that help themselves

So help yourselves now

Old man nicodemus could not hear his heart bleed

He saw that jesus had some tricks up his sleeve

He said "oh man jesus i can't do things your way

But i see you work for somebody big, so i'm backin' your play"

Old man nicodemus, his pockets they were deep

And on the day that they decided to put jesus to sleep

Jesus could not care for money now or any such thing

Old nicodemus paid to have jesus just buried like a king.

Well now, i ain't no preacher no preacher man's son

I done some bad things lord i like to have my fun

A thousand ways to heaven, a thousand ways to hell

Well i say, the good lord helps those that help themselves

So help yourselves now

Our father art in heaven hallowed be thy name

Told noah build a boat, on the driest of days

And everybody in the neighborhood thought old noah was insane

I guess when the waters receded now the truth was plain

Well now, i ain't no preacher no preacher man's son

I done some bad things but i like to have my fun

There's a thousand ways to heaven, a thousand ways to hell

Well i say, the good lord helps those that help themselves

So help yourselves now

Moses was a great man, parted the waters of the red sea

Down the road to egypt he made sure the slaves were free

Well he could speak to god, so they say, yes indeed

Well the noise of his voice woulda made our poor ears bleed

Moses he had an army i tell ya all his own

They stood in circles outside his very home

And when the pharaohs got to killin' they left ol' moses alone

But the romans drove those nails through jesus' bones

Well now, i ain't no preacher no preacher man's son

I done some bad things lord i like to have my fun

Why they got jesus now and not moses? who can tell

But they do say, the good lord helps those that helps themselves

So help yourselves now