At The Other End Of The Leash

I'm climbing up your old staircase

And finding where you're ticklish

I clean you out of my fingernails

And paw you out of my dish

And in the doughy face days end

Once I have licked your plate clean

You mutter on about infinity

I'm gonna show you what it means

Like a pretty girl in a wheelchair

That still claims she fell down the stairs

But if he touches you again

With those grubby little hands

I'll have to break them

Like some lovely legs in braces

With toothy smiley faces

So if he gets chopped up to bits

It must have been an accident

Must be a reason, don't need a reason

'Cause I know where you live

And I know where you sleep

And from the cradle to the grave

Cradle to the grave you'll behave

And when I fall in your Christmas tree

The dinner party reveals

In me robin egg blue and livery red

I hate to spoil your meal

But when I stop the good times rolling

With my hot breath in your ear

You know daddy loves you all so very much yeah

But daddy may be going away for a while, my dear

Like a pretty girl in a wheelchair

That still claims she fell down the stairs

But if he paws on you again

With those hungry little hands

Might have to bait him

Like some gorgeous girl in bedlam

There's something you're not saying

So won't it feel good to admit

This isolated incident

Don't need a reason, who needs a reason?

I come home right on time

Calmly loosen my necktie

We stare at the wall watch

We're moving the furniture around

I come home first in line

Wanna loosen my necktie

But it's your world we live in

We're moving the furniture around

Spend the next forty years moving the thermostat around.