The Last Saskatchewan Pirate

Well I used to be a farmer and I made a living fine

I had a little stretch of land along the CP line

But times went by and though I tried, the money wasn't there

And bankers came and took my land and told me "fair is fair"

I looked for every kind of job, the answer always no

"Hire you now?" they'd always laugh, "we just let twenty go!"

The government they promised me a measly little sum

But I've got too much pride to end up just another bum

Then I thought, who gives a damn if all the jobs are gone?

I'm gonna be a PIRATE on the river Saskatchewan

Chorus:

Cause it's a heave (ho!) hi (ho!) comin' down the plains

Stealin' wheat and barley and all the other grains

It's a ho (hey!) hi (hey!) farmers bar yer doors

When ya see the Jolly Roger on Regina's mighty shores

Well, you'd think the local farmers would know that I'm at large

But just the other day I found an unprotected barge

I snuck up right behind them and they were none the wiser,

I rammed their ship and sank it and I stole their fertilizer!

A bridge outside of Moosejaw spans a mighty river

Farmers cross in so much fear their stomachs are a-quiver

Cause they know that TRACTOR JACK is hiding in the bay

I'll jump the bridge and knock them cold and sail off with their hay!

chorus

Well, Mountie Bob he chased me, he was always at my throat

He'd follow on the shoreline cause he didn't own a boat

But the cutbacks were a-coming and the Mountie lost his job

And now he's sailing with us, and we call him Salty Bob!

A swingin' sword, a skull and bones and pleasant company

I never pay my income tax and screw the GST (SCREW IT)

Prince Albert down to Saskatoon I'm the terror of the seas

If you wanna reach the co-op, boy, you gotta get by me!

chorus

Well, Pirate life's appealing but you just don't find it here,

I've heard that in Alberta there's a band of buccaneers

They roam the Athabaska and sail to Fort McKay

And you're gonna loose your stetson if you have to pass their way!

Well, winter is a-comin' and a chill is in the breeze

My Pirate days are over once the river starts to freeze

I'll be back in springtime but now I have to go

I hear there's lots of plundering down in New Mexico!